baka_na_haha's Journal

Red feathers all over the floor, . . .
a ridiculous number of empty wine glasses scattered around - signs of a lovely, decadent evening.

It had been years since we've hosted a Murder (long enough for everyone to have forgotten the amazing red-and-black feather boa I have). This one was with our Gourmet Dinner group. People put a lot of time and effort into their costumes and really stayed in role. It was good to see the whole groups loosen up. Not a single one of us correctly guessed the murderer, but maybe that was because the killer did a great job of playing his role?) J's tux was a big success - and now, at thrift store prices, he has a tux in case the need ever arises.

The food was a bit disappointing, which is unusual for this group. The drink, wines, appetizers, and dessert were fabulous, but the soup and main dish were uninspiring. I don't think the Murder had anything to do with that - but we have had consistently incredible meals for so long, we have to hit a dud once in a while. Actually, this was probably a good time to have some sub-par course, since the Mystery took the focus off the food.

A medieval mystery could be fun sometime . . .

Sat, March 21:
J - 2
B - 2

Sun, March 22:
J - 12
B - 12

New Stages was fabulous!
I had wondered what it would be like when I didn't have my kid involved. And it was a bit less exciting (and anxiety-provoking). But the plays themselves were fantastic, creative and very well-done. There was an incredible range of content: the funny plays were hysterical, and the serious plays were very heavy. The talent is amazing, and I can't believe that they pull this all together in just a few weeks. It makes me very proud of the school and my community as well as optimistic for the future. As Dar says, "Teen-agers kick our butts!"

Friday, March 20:
J - 6
B - 8 (the dogs actually let me do a very long walk in the morning. It really must be Spring!)

Hair
I heard a piece on NPR about people whose hair spontaneously goes from curly to straight to curly again from time to time. Apparently it is not just me! One woman's hair changes completely ever 7 to 10 years. Too bad I haven't really timed it for myself. It was interesting to find that whether hair is straight or curly depends on the shape of the hair follicle (oval for curly, round for straight). There was,however, no enlightenment as to why some people have drastic changes suddenly over the life span: the reporter could not find any research which had come to conclusions as to why this happens (and only to some people). One theory is hormones (my own personal favorite theory for everything), but there is apparently no evidence one way or the other. And many companies are researching this heavily, since a product which could change your hair from straight to curly or back would be a big money-maker.

At first I thought "Yuck! Would anyone actually take a pill to change their hair?!" But then I recalled how I used to literally iron my hair when I was a kid to get it straight (burning it in the process). Then, later, I would spend money to have people put nasty chemicals on it every few months to get it curly. So, yes, I guess people would do such a thing.

Oh, well - at least I am not alone.

Thursday, March 19:

J - 4
B - 6

Very scary - but turned out fine
Yesterday was a gorgeous day and I was having my idea of a perfect afternoon: I had just listened to Zan's radio show while eating lunch and the dogs were condescending to let me take the first very long walk of the Spring. I was absorbed in noticing all the crocuses blooming and enjoying my music when I approached the high school and noticed tons of police cars blocking off the road and TV news vans - Not.A.Good.Sign!

Just then one of the crossing guards I know well (from millions of doggie walks) pulled over in his car next to me. I asked him if he knew what was happening and he told me that his wife (who works in the high school) had called him and said in a whisper that she was blocked or locked in - and then the phone cut out. He had rushed over, but couldn't get near the school. As we were talking, he got a call from his son (I love cell phones in times of crisis!) who had heard from his Mom that she was fine, but someone in the school had a gun and they were in lockdown. The crossing guard had to rush off to work elsewhere, but was cleared very concerned.

I tend to think I'm rotten in a crisis, but since this didn't directly concern me, I stayed pretty level-headed. My first thought was "Is there anything I could do to help?" I realized that the best thing I could do was to stay out of everyone's way and let them do their jobs. So I continued my dog walk, going a different way that didn't go near the school. I was terrified, and started thinking about all the kids that I really care about that were in that school at that moment. Adults, too, of course, but they came to mind later. I found myself praying that no one would be hurt - and realized (as I so often do) that it would be lovely to have someone/something to actually pray to, but unfortunately, I can't buy into that.

Thankfully, it wasn't long before I turned a corner and saw some policemen talking to a resident. He explained that it was a false alarm and was all over, and no one had been hurt. What a relief!
As far as I could see (from my very limited perspective) the whole incident couldn't have been handled better. Everyone had seemed calm and organized. I saw a Shake policeman giving a Cleveland policeman a high five and thanking him for his help. The second I got home, I checked shaker.org and there was already a message explaining the situation in detail.

Of course, my first thought when I heard that everyone was ok was "Thank God!" - How strange is that?! I guess those cultural influences die hard.

Wed, March 18:
J - 8
B - 8

Especially good Salsa night
We are starting to get comfortable enough with the dance so that we can actually keep up (at least until the end). I love the way they teach (the class is at John Carroll, but it is taught by Cleveland Swing and Salsa). They do a quick review of the basic steps every week so that newbies can participate fully. Then they teach completely new steps, one module at a time. Finally, at the end, they put together the several new steps into a fancy-looking combo. This works very well for people at all levels of dance experience. And, now that we are getting more comfortable, we can put the various new steps together in all different ways. The final combos are pretty challenging - even if we know each step, to string them all together and make the transitions without missing a beat takes some practice. But we just got a Salsa CD from the teachers, so we can practice the timing on our own. We both really worked up a sweat, so we know we got great exercise.

Conditioning is amusing: I did feel a very strong urge to stop for a beer and munchies after class. But, having decided to avoid bars on St. Patrick's Day, we went home and did fine with playing some Bridge Baron and making our own snack. J was too tired for a Buffy, but maybe another time. I do feel noble for breaking the pattern.

Tues, 3/17:
J - 8
B - 8

I'm giving this one more try
I keep saying that I'm going to start up again on my "system" of tracking healthy eating and exercise via lj - and then it's weeks between posts. I'm giving this one more try on lj. If I can't make this work, I may try Twitter - that would be quick and easy (although extremely boring) but would defeat the secondary purpose of keeping in better touch with people (especially my kids). So we'll see how this goes.

I was optimistic about my new activities. After all, I've added 4 (yes, 4!) extra days of exercise each week: 2 evenings of dancing and 2 evenings of fencing. With that much extra exercise, I'm sure to lose weight, right? Well, I may be building up my stamina, but as long as the extra exercise also leads to extra eating, this is not going to work. After Tuesday night Salsa, we are all worked up and much too pumped to just go home, so it is a natural to stop off at the only place open (a bar) and get a beer and some munchies. And at the Friday night dance, they would have to have munchies right there. And 'Doons is so much fun after Wed. fencing. And we stopped off at Cleats after Wulgar's fencing last Sunday. All this is very social and fun, but the extra beer and munchies are definitely not going to further my goals.

I don't do well when I tell myself "No, you can't do that" - so I may need to just come up with some compromise where I limit myself to only periodic after exercise bar-stops. I'll start with tonight: since it's St. Patrick's Day, the bars are likely to be noisy and obnoxious, so we have a good reason not to stop after dancing. Maybe we could do something completely different to wind down after dance - like watch a Buffy/Angel perhaps? It just might work.

Sun, March 15:
J - 8
B - 4 I had good intentions. But the dogs refused to do a long walk. I fully intended to get extra exercise on my own in the evening, but got carried away filling out annoying financial aid forms (how pathetic is that?) and completely forgot.

My thighs may never forgive me
I went to Wulfgar's unofficial fencing practice for the first time, and it was a lot of fun. The timing worked well - there was another beginning student there, so I didn't feel guilty for taking up so much of Wulfgar's time on the basics. And I was able to keep up with her fine, even though she was young and a martial arts student. In fact, she was the one who said she'd had enough first!

Unlike at the Event, this time I didn't really feel much at the time we were drilling. It was only the next day, when I squatted down to get something out of the bottom of the refrigerator, that my thighs started to complain - and bitterly! Oh well, who really needs to bend down anyway? or get up from a chair? or pick anything up from the floor?

Despite my body's opinion, I went ahead and ordered a plastron (sp?) anyway, so I guess maybe I'm going to keep giving this a try.

Mon, Feb. 2:
J - 8
B - 4

Less humbling dancing
It was just the second time we went to our Swing dance class after Winter break, but already we have gotten into the "swing" of it (ouch!) The class went really well and all the various steps are coming together smoothly. I was even able to show off a bit: one of the instructors casually mentioned that the women couldn't really learn how to follow in the beginner's class, since the guys haven't really learned how to lead. I protested that J was working hard to learn how to lead. So the instructor tried to see how well I could follow him - he tried a bunch of steps we haven't learned yet and I was able to follow him without any problem. He was suitably impressed and said he was sorry to have cast aspersions on J's ability to lead (and my ability to follow).

Our goal is to learn a variety of steps for each of the major dances so that we can go out dancing and be able to dance all evening without getting bored - knowing two steps of a dance is simply not enough! However, we are now comfortable enough with Swing that we feel ready to move on. So tomorrow night we are trying a Salsa class at John Carroll - I'm hoping that it will be sexy and excellent exercise.

Sun, Feb. 1:
J - 14
B - 12

January Event- part 2
I took one break from Troll to take Wulfgar's Introduction to Rapier class. It was actually a lot of fun! He just had us do some footwork, and we barely even held the swords at all, but it had a lot in common with dancing and I felt pretty comfortable with it. I did better than some of the other students, which felt good. Of course, after about 5 minutes, my thighs and butt were in agony, but that's exactly what Wulfgar told us should happen if we were doing it right. Besides, if I'm going to exercise, I want to feel it! I'm not sure whether I'll pursue rapier or not, but it is a definite possibility, especially since he has a brand-new student at the Sunday Unofficial Rapier Practice, so I wouldn't be the only total beginner.

The feast was a buffet instead of the usual several course, served meal. It did lack in pomp and circumstance, but one advantage was that it was done quickly. Cynwrig and I were exhausted, so we were glad to be done in time to be home at a reasonable hour. Ealdred's pork was especially delicious.

So, all in all, it was a lovely day. Yllaria looked gorgeous in her dress from Dulcia. And I was finally able to wear the puffy sleeves on my outfit. It was like wearing a down jacket, which kept me warm and cozy all day - much more convenient and practical than my heavy cloak.

Wed, Jan. 28:
J - 12
B - 6

What a mess!
We thought we were suitably prepared: J got up early and dutifully shoveled out the driveway, so there should have been no problem. However, I got my angle slightly wrong when pulling out of said driveway and got the car horribly stuck. J tried everything: carpets under wheels, jacking up a wheel and puttting boards underneath, you name it - to no avail. Finally, a young guy from down the street helped push and we were able to get the car out. I ended up 1 hour late for my first appointment. Luckily I was able to reach and she was fine with waiting, so that worked out fine. A couple of other people wisely cancelled due to the weather, but one other person who was not scheduled wanted to come in since her work had been cancelled, so it wasn't a total waste to have gone in.

Poor J had thought the roads would be clear enough for him to make his 1pm appointment on the Westside. After all, they always have the roads clear by noon, right? - Wrong! Partway there 480 ground to a complete halt and he realized that he would never make it on time. I helped him to leave messages for his afternoon appointments, and he's on his way back home.

I really have no interest in leaving this house (or driveway) again. Unless there is some reason to believe that roads have really cleared up, it's going to be very hard to convince me to go to Dessert Revel (even though we have a lovely, half-finished dessert to share). For now, I'm delighted to just be cozy at home. We'll see . . .

Tues, Jan. 27:
J - 6
B - 10

January Event
It was an unususally good event for me. Bork made an impressive showing in Court. First, Cynwrig was called up to get his (very well-deserved) Purple Fret. Of course, we all yelled "Bork!" I was surprised to hear afterward that the King had good-naturedly said to Cynwrig "I gather you're Bork - You hide it well". I guess our reputation is wider-spread than I had realized. Then Yllaria got her AOA and the King said something similar to her. She looked gorgeous in the dress Dulcia had made! Finally, Vasilii got a Purple Fret for his work with Eastwatch. Lots of people commented on how well Bork had done at Court. Lots of other people we know got awards, including Wulfgar getting a Sapphire.

Working at Troll was lots of fun for me - not quite as much fun as Heraldry, but not far behind. Dad and I went out Friday night to help set-up. Lady Sarra was well-organized and put things together very well. She made a very cozy "room" for Troll, so that when you walked into the building, the Troll tables were facing you so there was no escape. She even had a space-heater for us so we wouldn't get too cold. Since I was there Friday for set-up, I could arrange things with pretty tablecloths and banners.

We got there bright and early on Saturday, and Dorothea and I worked Troll for most of the day. It got a bit busy at times, but we ran things quite smoothly and there were never long lines at all. We got to talk to everyone and I even played Deputy Chatelaine some, when a couple of different sets of total newcomers wandered in (some people just saw the sign at the Fairgrounds and had no idea what we were doing there). It was fun and social and very tiring (since I had to grab things from different parts of the table, I was basically on my feet and running around all day). I was also delighted to hear that boffer went well - with Vedrix helping Nial, I didn't have to feel guilty at all. Troll is a much better place for me to be. Between Troll, Heraldry, and Chataleine stuff, I should be all set with things that are fun and don't make me nervous.

To be continued . . .

Sun, Jan. 25:
J - 12
B - 8

Mon, Jan. 26:
J - 8
B - 4

Too many options!
We are trying to figure out someplace to go on an exciting trip with the whole family in late May/June - but there are too many choices! We haven't gone on a real vacation in ages, and this may be a lousy time due to the economy, but if we don't go now, we may not be able to go as a family. We are looking for someplace a bit off the beaten track, and possibly not too horribly exorbitant, but we don't have a clear idea of what we want to do or see, so it's hard to narrow things down. It's fun to read and fantasize about going different places. What a fun "problem" to have!

Thursday, Jan. 22:
J - 6
B - 10

A humbling experience
We went back to our ballroom dance class after missing since the start of the holidays. I confess that we started out fairly cocky: We had taken several Swing classes before the break and felt pretty comfortable with it, and we had learned most of the steps on the sheet the instructor gave us. When the teacher (a different one than before) said she was going to do review, I was inwardly disappointed. After all, we knew all that already and needed to move forward, not review, right?

Wrong! She showed us a more elegant way to do the basic step, which is totally different and seems to upset our muscle memory. Then, she reviewed the basic underarm turn (we are talking very basic here) and we realized that, while what we had been doing seemed to work, it simply wasn't right. So, it feels like we are starting all over. That's actually a good thing, since this way we won't get bored with the Swing class and we will end up doing a much better version. But, for now, this means practice, practice.

I also plan to try to dance for at least 1/2 hour most days, so that it adds up to real exercise, in addition to fun.

And, yes, I'm going to start yet again with my eating-well-and exercise daily tally:

Wed, Jan. 21:

J - 10
B - 10

However . . .
this winter break was stressful and not at all restful, due to tons of things going wrong, one after another. Nothing was a disaster, everything was ultimately solveable - but not relaxing.

For example: we'd just gotten back from a more-tense-than-usual visit to J's parents and were ready to enjoy actual Christmas. On Christmas day, our hard drive crashed. At first we thought it was annoying but we'd be fine because of our great back-up system we had in place. Then we discovered that our back-up system hadn't been working since February. Ultimately, we discoverd by some stroke of luck, it actually had been backing up the computer that crashed, just not the computer that didn't crash.
So we were extremely lucky.

The next day, we are rushing to make our appointment to have our hard-drive checked when Z calls us on the cell phone to say that Georgie's bleeding all over the phone. So we rush back home to drop J off to deal with Georgie, then rush back to deal with computer. Of course, X's flight back to Boston was cancelled, after we had dropped him off at Akron Airport and driven back home. Again, everything worked out ok, but definitely not relaxing.

Whatever happened to beach vacations?!

Tues, Jan. 6:
J - 4
B - 6

Wed, Jan. 7:
J - 8
B - 6

The important things . . .
were great over break: It was wonderful to have both kids home for so long! The house was full of kids coming and going at all hours and it was comfortably chaotic for the whole time. We played games new and old - it was a riot to play The Garden Game with supplements made by the kids when they couldn't spell and didn't quite grasp the logistics of the game. (OK, to be fair, X still can't spell and who could resist have a plant #42 even though it was impossible to play). We did tons of fun shopping, re-vamping X's wardrobe with items at great sale prices and thrift stores, and finding an awesome Rocky Horror outfit for Z. We ate many of the kids' favorite foods, mostly homemade but also including Japanese food at Otani and dim sum at Li Wah. We finally took the time to give X practice at driving so that he is now confident and ready to join the real world (if necessary). We came up with many excellent project ideas, most of which may not get implemented for a while. And we have a start on plans for a Spring visit to Boston and a summer vacation. Good time with the kids is always a treat!

Mon, Jan. 5:

J - 8
B - 6

Happy Belated Agnosticalia!
I had prepared in advance for this important holiday - Hunted to make sure I had the date correct, wrapped a gift for X, felt totally ready. Then, in the excitement of picking X up at the airport (and doing a million other things), I completely forgot to celebrate.

Oh well, I hope that everyone had a Happy Agnosticalia!

It doesn't get better than this
This was the first time we've all been together since Zan went to college, and it was great! There were good talks, lots of kids all over the house, new games (Starfarers of Catan and Ticket to Ride - Europe), Peking Duck, Buffy, good music, Christmas tree, and some time to just relax.

The quintessential moment was when a horde of kids had just tromped up from the basement to eat pomegranates and raid our refrigerator. Amidst the cheery chaos of kids and dogs, my friend Marcy and Harriet dropped by. As soon as she walked in, Marcy started to cry - the atmosphere in my house was exactly what she wanted for her kids and grandkids, but they were unhappily stuck at her ex-husband's house with tons of tension and fighting. It does make me appreciate how very lucky I am!

The stressful battle to get Zan back to school despite 2 canceled flights, one impossibly delayed flight, and literally hours on hold on the phone wasn't enough to spoil the lovely feel of the weekend. And I don't even have to feel bad that the house is so quiet now - we will barely have time to get the house back in order again before they are back for the long winter break.

This is good.

An ideal learning plan for us
One goal J and I have had is to get back to ballroom dancing (after more than 20 years). We don't have nearly as much free time as we had expected, but we did free up Tuesday evenings together, and I think we have devised an ideal plan for painless learning: We found a place close by where we can take a 45 minute group dance lesson on Tuesday evenings. We don't have to make any commitment, it's just pay as you go, so we don't have to go every single Tuesday. We can actually learn a fair amount in 45 minutes. And we've discovered a great way to practice so that we retain what we've learned in the lesson - we just practice what we've learned for one song each day. Since one song is literally about 3 minutes, there really is no day when we can't squeeze in 3 minutes of practice and it's really working. We can already do a credible Swing, with enough steps so that we don't get bored. Add to that some Learn to Dance DVDs from the library with brief lessons and we are on our way to doing a decent Fox Trot. It's quick and easy and fun, so I think that we can keep it up.

Our public "debut" at the 100th Bomb Group with friends got postponed because the restaurant schedule changed. This is probably a good thing, since we now have 2 more weeks to reduce the odds of total humiliation. 2 more weeks of daily practice and we should be - well, 2 weeks better than we are now.

We are serious enough about this that we are going to buy some dancing shoes this weekend. For us, that's true commitment!

Wed, Nov. 19:
J - 8
B - 4

It's not really "empty nest" . . .
but more like "differently nested". We still have the pitter-patter of eight little feet, and those feet do seem to be taking up more and more of our time. Thankfully, everyone one is basically fine, but after one week of Georgie's GI upset, we then had to deal with a cancer scare (and the removal of a tumor which turned out to be benign). It's a huge relief that nothing is serious! But these puppies do play a major part in our lives, so our nest is hardly "empty".

And, let's fact it - the birdies never totally fly away from the coop: we keep in very good touch and stay involved in tons of ways. And everyone will be home in just a week for Thanksgiving - and for a much longer visit just a few weeks after that.

I'm not sure that we even have any more time than we did when kids were permanently home. However, since we have the illusion of more time, we are doing more fun stuff together. So far, I think we are getting the advantages of the perception of a change, without the loneliness and sadness that that change seems to imply. So, we are again managing to get the best out of the situation.

Now, I have to get back into my routine of tracking exercise and healthy eating, and not let excuses like vet visits and health scares disrupt my own self-care!

Mon, Nov. 17:
J - 8
B - 2

Tues, Nov. 18:
J - 6
B - 6

Georgie won out over Melissa Ferrick
Actually, it was no contest.

Georgie had been sick to her tummy on Sunday, clearly feeling miserable. But she seemed to get it all out of her system and woke up Monday morning all perky and happy. We gradually re-introduced foods and she seemed totally fine. So when she started throwing up again out of the blue on Tuesday afternoon, I called the vet. He checked her out very thoroughly and everything seemed fine, he gave her some meds to settle her stomach, probably just some virus. But - if she continued to throw up, that would be a bad sign, so we needed to keep an eye on her Tuesday.

So, watching Georgie not throw up took priority over the Melissa Ferrick concert. We were able to give our tickets to Maggie and Jared, so they weren't wasted. Georgie seems just fine now, but we will take things even more gradually and keep an eye on her. And we used the time well (especially considering what a busy week this is): We (well, actually J) carved pumpkins - they are intended to look like Georgie and Yoshi. As usual with our pumpkins, no one else would ever recognize who they are supposed to be, but we can tell, so that's what counts. I'm just glad Georgie seems better - and we'll see Melissa Ferrick next time.

Tues, Oct. 28:
J - 2
B - 4

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